I’d never, ever hurt a lady but I’d be happy to punch a feminist.
It’d bring me great joy.
I’m 6’2 and weigh 180lbs
ready when you are
DID YOU MOTHERFUCKERS REALLY THINK YOU WERE DONE WITH ME? I THINK NOT. THAT’S RIGHT IT’S THE SUGAR SCRUB CHICK BACK WITH ANOTHER FUCKING TUTORIAL. YOU BITCHES HAVE BEEN ASKING ME FOR AGES TO MAKE ANOTHER ONE OF THESE FUCKING POSTS AND IT’S FUCKING LATE SO HERE YOU GO FUCKERS WE GON LEARN SOME SHIT SO SIT DOWN AND BE QUIET
SO WE ALL WANT LIPS RED AS THE BLOOD OF ANGRY MEN RIGHT AND WHO DOESN’T FUCKING LIKE ARTS AND CRAFTS AND I DON’T EVEN NEED TO TALK ABOUT HOW HARD IT IS TO FIND LIPSTICK FOR FUCKING COSPLAY SO BEHOLD THE HUMBLE CRAYON YOU LITTLE SHITS
GET A CRAYON. AND NOT JUST ANY CRAYON A FUCKING CRAYOLA CRAYON DON’T EVEN TRY WITH THAT ROSEART SHIT BECAUSE I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND RIP OUT YOUR UVULA. IF YOU WANNA GET REALLY ARTSY WHIP OUT ONE OF THESE BAD BOYS
AND BREAK UP SOME CRAYONS TO GET THE PERFECT SHADE OF BLUE GREEN FOR THAT BADASS COSPLAY YOU’VE GOT PICKED OUT BUT MARK MY WORDS NO MORE THAN ONE FUCKING CRAYON’S WORTH OF BITS BETTER GO INTO THIS FUCKING BOWL.
SPEAKING OF WHICH, YOU NEED SOME OTHER FUCKING SHIT IN THERE SO GO GET SOME OIL. THE GOOD STUFF. I’M TALKING EVOO BITCHES THE VIRGINAL BLOOD OF THE MOST TENDER OLIVES IN ALL THE LAND. SQUEEZE SOME OF THAT HEAVENLY LUBRICANT INTO YOUR BOWL, ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON, THAT’LL DO PIG, THAT’LL DO. NOW GO FIND SOME SHEA BUTTER OR COCONUT OIL AND GLOP ABOUT 1/2 A TEASPOON OF THAT IN YOUR BOWL. NOW GO TO YOUR MAGICAL CABINET OF WONDERS AND FIND SOME NICE SMELLING SHIT. COULD BE VANILLA EXTRACT. COULD BE LAVENDER OIL. I DON’T KNOW BRO WHATEVER YOU THINK SMELLS LIKE THE SILKY UNDERBELLY OF A NEWBORN UNICORN(important note make sure you use a FOOD SAFE oil if it doesn’t say it’s food safe/food grade don’t use it!) GRASP THE BOTTLE FIRMLY, SCREAM LIKE A VICTORIOUS PTERODACTYL, AND DROP 1-4 DROPS OF THAT SWEET SMELLING LIQUID IN THERE.
I HOPE YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS RIGHT THERE BECAUSE IT IS THE HEATING VESSEL FOR YOUR GLORIOUS LIPSTICK THAT’S RIGHT LIKE A VIKING WARLORD YOU ARE GOING TO USE A DOUBLE BOILER. SO GET A SAUCEPAN AND HEAT SOME WATER, THEN PLOP THAT SWEET SMELLING BOWL OF OIL AND WAX ON TOP OF THAT STEAMY WATER LIKE THE COLLISION OF YOUR OTP IN A BAD FANFIC OH YEAH. STIR THAT SHIT UNTIL EVERYTHING IS MELTY AND SMOOTH YOU DON’T WANT TO RUIN YOUR SPOONS SO I USE A DISPOSABLE CHOPSTICK FUCK YEAH RECYCLING NOW ONCE THAT SHIT IS SOFT LIKE THE SUPPLE SKIN OF YOUR HEAVENLY BOOTY, YOU NEED SOMETHING TO POUR IT INTO
WELL DAMN GOOD THING YOU PICKED UP SOME CONTACT CASES LAST TIME YOU WERE AT THE STORE OR MAYBE YOU HAVE SOME EMPTY CHAPSTICK TUBES OR JUST SOME SMALL TUPPERWARE I DON’T KNOW BUT GOSH YOU ARE SO RESOURCEFUL AND PRETTY YOU DESERVE NICE LIPSTICK LIKE THIS ALSO TAKE SOME TIME FOR YOU THIS WEEKEND AND NEVER FORGET HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU
I’M GLAD WE HAD THAT MOMENT TOGETHER NOW BECAUSE NOTHING IS MORE METAL THAN SAFETY, TAKE A THICK HAND TOWEL OR AN OVEN MITT OR SOMETHING AND GRIP THAT BOWL OF COLORFUL GOOP AND POUR GENTLY INTO THAT RECEPTACLE YOU PROCURED. YOU WILL PROBABLY SPILL SOME BUT THAT’S OKAY YOU’RE ONLY HUMAN. POP THAT SHIT IN THE FRIDGE BECAUSE YOU’RE AN IMPATIENT MOTHERFUCKER AND YOU WANT YOUR LIPSTICK NOW GODDAMMIT AND ONCE IT HARDENS SLATHER THAT CREAMY GOODNESS ON THICK, SLIDE ON SOME SUNGLASSES, AND HEAD INTO BATTLE TO DESTROY THE PATRIARCHY CLASS DISMISSED MOTHERFUCKERS
I got a migraine and threw up because of this
i cant sleep cause of this now
Gail Simone’s short story for the Time Warp #1 anthology. I’m not a huge fan of Simone’s ongoing work but I have to say, her short stories are wonderful. Thank you for this one.
Art by Gael Bertrand, published by Vertigo.
I was very proud of this story, with amazing art by Gael Bertrand. My first Vertigo piece!
That was beautiful.
holy heckaroonie this is amazing
this is fucking incredible
please read this it’s so important i am so angry
I believe this story 100%, because I had a similar experience at RISD.
I went to RISD’s pre college program in the summer of 2012. I was doing fine, up until a point where I got pretty stressed. I was told to go to the health offices to talk to someone one day because I was having a mild panic attack. I went to the health services offices and at first they were nice. They said that I was fine and that everything would be ok. They asked me if I would like to be alone and I said no, because I was having a mild panic attack and I wanted people to be with me. This is when they started acting weird. One of the nurses left and was on the phone for a very long time. After about 20 minutes, she came back and said an ambulance was on it’s way and I had to go to the hospital.
I was so confused. Why the heck did I have to go to the hospital? Surely that would only freak me out more! I verbally resisted, and they said they were prepared to use physical force. That’s when I got really scared. I agreed, and when the ambulance came, I walked outside to meet it without resistance. I was grabbed by two paramedics and put on a stretcher. I was then STRAPPED DOWN to said stretcher. My entire body was velcroed down to the stretcher. Don’t believe me? I snagged a picture when no one was paying attention.
After that I was taken to the hospital. While in the ambulance, I was forced to give a small amount of blood for some reason. Once we got to the hospital I was NOT ALLOWED to get up from the stretcher. They told me I was not allowed to got off and these straps remained on until I was taken to a room. Once in the room, ALL of my belongings were taken from me. Phone, wallet, keys, even a doodle folded up in my pocket. I was then given clothes to change into and I was refused privacy while I did so. A nurse was ALWAYS present.
After I got changed they sent people in to take my vitals, etc. Then they sent I psychologist in. She asked me if I knew what was happening and I said I had no idea and I was scared. She said “you’re here because you tried to kill yourself and the school was worried you were a danger to yourself and you would also possibly hurt someone.”
Excuse me? I had a MILD PANIC ATTACK and this is what RISD told the hospital.
After about 30 minutes of talking and showing her that I had absolutely no lacerations (they told them I was slitting my wrists), they said “Then why are you here? You don’t need to be here.”
Overall, I was in the ER for 2 hours. I was released and then went straight to the offices. Since I had taken that picture, AND had a note from the hospital saying I didn’t need to go and was fine, I got a formal apology from the program. However, they NEVER paid the bills and I had to pay both the hospital and ambulance bills.
Moral of the story? FUCK YOU, RISD.
holy shit stella. re-reblogging for new info
please read all of this post. what happened to these people at RISD is inexcusable.
Ok I had a really similar story but at a different school. I went to SPU in Seattle and was dealing with my paranoid anxiety at the time. I made the mistake of taking too much tylenol to make myself sleep and I was off to the hospital, taken care of, and then told at 2am that I couldn’t come back to campus even though I had no way of getting to my moms house an hour away. I crashed at a friends and was prepared to go to the campus the next day to talk to therapists and get better! But when I got there they told me I had a week to pack my things and leave. If I didn’t get therapy I wasn’t allowed to come back. I also HAD to be on medication. They kept telling me I was trying to kill myself but in all honesty I just wanted to fall asleep and try to calm myself down. They treated me like I was a criminal and booted me off the campus. I barely had any money and I had to try and find an apartment.
SCHOOLS DON’T KNOW HOW TO CARE FOR STUDENTS WITH ANXIETY OR DEPRESSION AND THIS NEEDS TO CHANGE.
BOOTING A KID ON THE STREET DOESN’T SOLVE A PROBLEM.
Never Going Back Again | Fleetwood Mac
The rape joke is that at the time,
you didn’t know people had sex to express love.
The rape joke is that the only other person
who’d seen you naked was your mom.
The rape joke is that he called you ‘beautiful’ first.
The rape joke is that he held your hands together
and told you to ‘try harder’ when you struggled.
The rape joke is that you believed him
when he told you were overreacting.
The rape joke is that your grandma
called him a nice boy and asked him to stay for dinner.
The rape joke is that he winked at you
when you apologized to your parents for not coming
downstairs the first time you were called.
The rape joke is that his friends
high-fived him for “getting some.”
The rape joke is that you still don’t feel like
you’ve regrown the pieces he stole.
The rape joke is that he was conceived when his
dad slapped himself into his snoring mother.
The rape joke is that her friends told her
she was lucky someone wanted her.
The rape joke is that each year in the United States,
32,000 other women’s bellies
ripen with life against their will.
The rape joke is that he never learned
to touch without scarring.
The rape joke is that your classmate thinks
‘have you seen what asses look like in yoga pants?’
is an argument.
The rape joke is your new boyfriend kissing
you and telling you he ‘raped’ his math test.
The rape joke is that ‘Why are girls so scared of rape? Y’all should feel pride that a guy risked his life in jail just to fuck you’
is a popular Tweet right now.
The rape joke is that you wake up to
the memory of him laughing,
“now that wasn’t so bad, was it?”
The rape joke is that it’s been twelve years and
you still quiver when someone touches you.
The rape joke is that he hasn’t stopped laughing.
The rape joke is that you forgot how to.
oh my god
I INTERRUPT THIS PROGRAM TO SHOW YOU A BRILLIANT VIDEO THAT USES DIFFERENT SCENES OF THE ANIME TO CREATE A DIFFERENT TIMELINE IN LIKE 4 MINUTES
THIS IS AMAZING WOW YOU GOTTA WATCH THIS IT’S STILL SO TRAGIC
Hey everyone I’m back with more cosplay help!
These lipsticks are long lasting and the color payoff is amazing.
They are also a bit cheaper than my other lipstick post [ X ]
Whether you’re cosplaying or just looking for colorful lipstick then I would really recommend Coloured Raine. You can check them out on Instagram herefor pictures of people wearing their lipsticks.
Also, they are cruelty free! <3
Hi! Sorry to be a bother again. I hate bringing this stuff up over and over but really this will be the last time in a while this is brought up. I just wanted to say that I put together an Indiegogo project for my surgery.
Insurance stuff finally got sorted and they arent going to cover it. So looks like its out of pocket for me! *cries*
Thought it might be better to put this all on one spot rather than a bunch of garbled txt posts T v T ;;;; sorry about the confusion and please pass this on if you have the time. this means a lot to me and i know everyone is tight on money and i don’t want to be an annoying burden- any little bit helps! The great thing about Indiegogo is that even if the goal isnt reached you still get what was raised so it will go along way in me saving up in the long term if this goes well :D Thank you!- even if its only reblogging or passing the word on via other social media.
Thank you everyone! I really mean it. You all have been too kind T A T <333333333333333333333333333333333333
Just one last reminder for all of this T v T thank you EVERYONE who has helped out so far! It all ends tomorrow/ 42 hrs from now.
If you happen to see this after the deadline you an always go to my main tumblr page and on the side bar there is a donate button. THank you everyone again! You’re all too kind for me to handle @_____@;;;; working on some osrt of thank you backgrounds for download or something in the free time btwn commissions n work T o T <3
8 ways to spot Emotional Manipulation
1. There is no use in trying to be honest with an emotional manipulator. You make a statement and it will be turned around. Example: I am really angry that you forgot my birthday. Response - “It makes me feel sad that you would think I would forget your birthday,
so i was using my professor wakeman voice on Lolo and this came out
i’ve had a bit too much candy to make this sound just right, but enjoy the joke anyway. <3